Rating: FRT - Just a couple of words, nothing you wouldn't hear on television.
Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to these characters and am making no profit from their use. This story is strictly for entertainment purposes.
Second story for wide_rider. Buffy telling someone about the first time Giles kissed her. I combined elements from two previous stories, Daddy's Little Girl and The Hunger, part 2.
The First Time
Buffy sat on her daughters’ bed, listening as Miri talked about her evening. She had gone out on her first ‘grown-up’ date with her childhood friend, Robbie. The date had ended in Miri’s first kiss. Rupert had freaked, but had hid his reaction from Miri, and Buffy had come upstairs with her for girl talk.
Miri had been gushing for several minutes, but had finally fallen silent. She was gazing sightlessly into space, a smile on her face, when out of the blue she asked, “What was it like for you, Mom?”
“What was what like, sweetie?”
“The first time.”
Buffy’s breath caught in her throat. She had already had the ‘birds and bees’ talk with Miri, but she hadn’t been expecting this. Not so soon. “Um, the first time?”
“You know, the first time Daddy kissed you. What was it like?”
“Oh, that first time.”
Miri looked startled. “Mom! Not that! Something like that is private. I wouldn’t want details about something like that.” She giggled. “Not unless you wanted to share.”
“I think not, at least not for a few more years. So, the first time your father and I kissed. Well, you might as well get comfortable, because this is going to take some time.”
Miri came over to the bed and snuggled next to Buffy. Now it was Buffy’s turn to gaze into space. After a few minutes, she began. “It wasn’t until after Sunnydale had been destroyed. Ru had a Council credit card, so we were booked into a hotel in LA while we waited for the people who had been injured to be released from the hospital.”
“A group of us had gone out to a club and your Aunt Dawn had insisted that Ru, who we all called Giles at that time, come with us. He had protested that he was tired and just wanted to stay at the hotel but, as you know, your Aunt Dawn can be pretty persuasive.”
Miri giggled. “That’s one way of putting it. Uncle Xander has others.”
It still amazed Buffy that Xander had married her little sister. She shook her head. “Yes, well, we all went out to this club, but Giles refused to dance. He just sat at the table and watched.”
Miri giggled again. Buffy raised her eyebrow in enquiry. “Watched? Duh, Watcher? What else would he do?”
Buffy grabbed her ribs, tickling her. Over Miri’s laughter she said, “Smart ass.” When Miri quieted down, Buffy continued.
“A lot of things had gone wrong, in Sunnydale, just before the end. Part of it was due to the stress of the situation, and there was a lot of hidden anger, in all of us, over things that had happened over the years. I really think that we were being influenced by the First Evil. I know that I said and did some things that I would never have done otherwise. One of them was a thing that I said to Giles. A mean, deliberately hurtful, thing, and what was worse was that it was the truth, or least partially the truth.” She stopped, lost in the memory.
Miri nudged her. “What did you say?”
“I told him I didn’t need him anymore.”
“What I should have said was that I didn’t need a Watcher anymore, and that was true. Giles had left just after Willow brought me back, because I was leaning on him too much.” Buffy stopped speaking; a sad look on her face. “He thought he was keeping me from being strong, that he was standing in my way.” She sighed.
“So when I told him that I didn’t need him any more, I had been without a Watcher almost two years. But I did need him, as Giles. I needed him as a partner, someone to share the burden. I was angry with him so I deliberately said what I knew would hurt him the most.” She gave a little huff. “He got even a couple of nights later. He sided with the others when they kicked me out of the house and put Faith in charge.”
Miri turned around and looked at Buffy in shock. “He kicked you out of the house?”
“Actually, it was Dawn who told me to leave. But he stood there and let them do it. Didn’t protest at all. You know that when a Watcher, who always puts his Slayer first, allows her to be banished from the only safe place in town, there must be some compelling forces at work.”
Miri continued to stare. “Aunt Dawn kicked you out? You’re right, something was influencing people.”
Buffy smiled. “So, I was acting like a total bitca, Giles was doing his stiff upper lip routine, Xander got hurt, and Willow was feeling mega guilt cause she was attracted to Kennedy. Then I found the scythe. The minute I touched it, my mind became clear. I could see what needed to be done. I could also see how badly I had been hurting people, especially Giles. I've never been good at apologies and I didn't know how to approach him, so I just stuck with my normal method of not saying anything and hoping it would all blow over."
Miri frowned, shaking her head. "That doesn't work. You have to get things out in the open and clear the air."
Buffy hugged her. "I know that now, oh wise one. Anyway, we defeated the First, Sunnydale became a big hole in the ground, and we were staying at a hotel waiting for the more seriously injured to heal. We decided to go to a club and we dragged Giles along with us."
"Yada, yada, you already covered that part." Miri yelped as Buffy grabbed her ribs again.
"Silence, munchkin." Buffy gave her a mock frown. "Now, where was I? Right, the club. He wouldn't dance, even though Willow and Dawn had tried to get him to." Buffy forestalled the question. "Why didn't I ask him? Cause I wanted him to ask me. Dumb, I know. I was on the far side of the club when a slow dance started and I decided to go over and talk to him." Buffy fell silent, her mind going back to that night.
When she got nearer to the table she saw that Giles was sitting slumped back in the chair with his eyes closed. Buffy gave up any pretence of dancing and rushed to his side. "Giles?" His eyes snapped open and Buffy gasped, taking a step back. He looked away, but it was too late. She had seen his secret. In the silence between them the song ended, and for the first time Buffy listened to the lyrics.
'A game that you can't win.
That was what she had seen in his eyes. Hunger. She had heard the saying 'like a starving man staring at a feast' before, but now she knew what it meant. That look had said that he was dying and that she was his only hope of survival. Buffy's heart started pounding so hard that she began to shake.
Giles shoved away from the table and stood. The suddenness startled her and Buffy took another step back. He gave her another burning look, then turned and began to leave.
He stopped but didn't look at her again. "Not now, Buffy."
"But, we need to talk."
"Not here and not now. I'll see you back at the hotel." He took a couple of steps.
Buffy rushed to his side, grabbing his arm. "Giles," she began.
He stopped and lowered his head, still not looking at her. "Please, Buffy, leave me some small measure of dignity. We can discuss this later." He pulled his arm away and hurried out of the club.
Buffy sank into his chair, staring blankly in the direction he had gone, "I love you too," she whispered.
"I went back to the dance floor and asked Faith and Willow to keep an eye on everyone, then rushed after Giles, but he was already gone. I headed back to the hotel. I knocked on his door and when he didn't answer I thought he was ignoring me, so I picked the lock and went in, but he wasn't there."
"You know how to pick locks? Cool! Will you show me?"
"No. Ask your father, he's the one who taught me." Buffy paused, then returned to her story. "I wasn't worried, not at first. I just thought that maybe his cab had taken a different route from the club and got stuck in traffic or something. But it kept getting later and later and still no Giles. I started imagining all sorts of things; he had been in a wreck, that he had decided to walk and had been mugged or even worse, had been attacked by vampires and killed, or turned. At 3 am the others came back from the club, and still no Giles. I was in a total panic, but I didn't know what to do. I was on the verge of calling Angel and asking for his help, when Giles came through the lobby doors."
"I ran over and started yelling at him, asking him where he had been. I really don't remember what all I said but, later, whenever I would ask them, Willow and Dawn would just laugh and refuse to tell me. Giles stood there with this strange look on his face and when I finally stopped yelling he walked past me like I wasn't there and got in the elevator. I was stunned. I couldn't believe he didn't answer me. I jumped in the next elevator and went after him."
Miri started giggling. "I know what you said."
Buffy stared. "How?"
"Aunt Dawn told me on my birthday."
"Nope, I promised. If you want to know, you need to ask Daddy."
"Maybe I will. So, I got off the elevator just as the door to his room was closing. I ran down and slammed it open."
Giles was standing at he window, looking out over the city. He didn't turn around. "I believe it's customary to knock before entering someone's room."
"You didn't answer me. Where have you been?"
"That's none of your concern."
"Giles, I've been worried sick."
"Well, as you can see, I'm fine. Good night, Buffy."
She drew in a sharp breath and stormed across the room. "Oh no you don't, mister. I want to know where you've been." She grabbed his arm and spun him around. He glared at her. Buffy frowned and sniffed. "Cigarette smoke and whisky? You went to a bar?" Her eyes widened in outrage.
"I've been waiting here, worried that you were lying in an alley, dead, or worse, and you've been drinking in a bar? How could you?"
Giles drew back. "I'm an adult, well past the age of consent. I am not your father, your brother, or your husband. I don't have to explain my actions to you. Get out."
Buffy put her hands on her hips. "No, you are not my father, my brother, or my husband. You are more than that. You are my Watcher. Mine. And you damn well do answer to me."
He leaned over, his nose almost touching hers. "So, now, I'm your Watcher? A week ago you told me you didn't need me anymore. You slammed a door in my face."
"I was hurt and angry. I was being stupid. You know I didn't mean it."
"I am not a mind reader, Buffy. How, exactly, was I supposed to know that you didn't mean it?"
"When I told you that I valued your opinion of my plan to activate the Slayers. When we joked together just before the battle. I was with you. You, not Spike."
He growled. "Don't go comparing me to your pet vampire. I am a human male. And I am telling you once again, if you don't want to face the consequences, leave."
"I know exactly who you are, Watcher-mine, and as for the consequences, bring 'em on."
"Mom, you didn't really say 'bring 'em on', did you?"
Buffy nodded ruefully. "Yeah."
Miri shook her head. "That sounded like something out of a cheesy movie."
"I know, and, later, we both had a good laugh about it. But right then, it just pushed his buttons."
Giles stared at her angrily for a long moment then reached out, pulling her to him roughly. Buffy expected his kiss to be equally rough, but she was surprised by the gentleness of his mouth. His lips ghosted over hers, barely touching, back and forth. Buffy moaned, "Giles, please" and he deepened the kiss.
Long moments later they drew apart for a deep breath and Buffy became aware that she was sitting on Giles' lap. She looked around. Somehow they had moved from in front of the window to the chair in the far corner. Giles' arms loosened slightly, but she didn't move except to lay her head on his shoulder.
"I was so scared," she whispered, "please don't do that to me again."
"Buffy, you don't have to do this. If you want me to stay, just ask."
She pulled back, looking into his eyes, "Oh, please, this isn't about that 'father's love' crap is it? Cause if you think of me as a daughter and kissed me like that, eww! I have a father, somewhere, and I certainly don't want to kiss him the way I just kissed you." She caressed his cheek. "I love you, Giles."
"Forgive my doubts, but you've never given any indication."
"Neither have you, and excuse me, but I did give you a hint once."
Giles frowned, thinking. "When?"
'You're very, very, old, and it's gross."
He continued to frown as he thought, then his face cleared. "You were jealous?"
"Oh, love, we really need to work on your methods of communication. So much time wasted."
"Maybe, maybe not. It wasn't our time, or we would have worked it out, somehow."
From the doorway Dawn said, "If you two are going to stop yelling now, I'm going to bed. See you later." She closed the door.
Buffy moaned and hid her face against Giles' chest. "I'm going to kill her one of these days."
Giles chuckled. "I'll help." He tilted her face up for another kiss. They were both breathing hard when he lifted her off his lap. "You really need to go, love."
Buffy nodded and went to the door, but stopped before opening it. Staring at the wood she said, "I told you."
She heard Giles moved across the room. He stopped behind her, bending forward to whisper against her ear, "I love you." Reaching around her he opened the door and gently urged her out of the room. She turned and smiled. "We'll finished this conversation later, right."
"Indeed. Later, love." He closed he door. All of the other doors burst open and the hallway was filled with cheering Slayers. Buffy groaned and buried her face in her hands. "I am really going to kill Dawn."
Buffy smiled as she finished speaking. Miri smiled too, but looked a little confused. "But, you never said what it was like."
"Oh, sweetie, every man kisses a little differently. All I can say is that every kiss your father has given me has been given with love. From the gentlest brush on my cheek to the most passionate. I really don't know how else to explain."
Buffy thought for a few minutes, then giggled. "You know the old saying, you have to kiss a lot of frogs to find your prince?" Miri nodded. "Your father is my prince. And you'll just have to kiss your own frogs to figure out the difference."
Miri giggled too. "So Robbie is a frog?"
"Probably. But some frogs are pretty nice kissers too. So don't be afraid to experiment. But just with kisses," she added hastily.
"Got it, Mom. Frogs get the kisses only. Save the good stuff for the prince." They laughed together, then Miri want to bed and Buffy went downstairs to her prince.